KrisHawk
by on April 16, 2019
149 views

Non-Biased Self Help Guide

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Not all addictions are bad. There can be good addictions. Example I have an addiction to buying rare expensive vinyl LPs for insane prices, but it doesnt impact me in anyway. Some people go gambling once a year or every few years, and some can’t help but go broke to where they can’t pay their rent. But this is a self help guide to those suffering because of their addiction. This is not the same as “suffering” in BDSM terms which cash subs enjoy.

 

For example a sub of mine wanted to have his gas cut off (his utility bills are in my name) but it was early spring not long ago. Only a little chilly but he wanted it to happen. He had food in his fridge but would suffer being cold. He would wear extra clothing. The head trip of suffering of being slightly chilly is not affecting him negatively. He enjoys having his account drained every so often. He lives a life where he can still go out to eat and live a social life. He goes through a type of suffering that doesn’t impact his mental or physical well being. Enough about Mike.

 

Lately I’ve been having deeper discussions with subs that I see suffering and not in a good way. Suffering within BDSM should be enjoyable even if youre “hurting.” If youre a sub you know what I mean by that. There are two ways of how addiction to this type of submission can work. Living like my slave Mike for example that you will read about in the blog right above. Mike has an addiction to financial domination. But it doesn’t affect his work or his family (with one exception but it was a good thing for him….) His health is good and he isn’t starving. (Although he has talked recently about me instructing his diet and writing his grocery list now that he’s single.)

 

The bad type of addiction is what causes TRUE pain and regret in the scene of financial domination for a sub. Subs who can’t control themselves are hurting themselves to where its beyond the healthy realms of BDSM. I have a bachelor’s in psychology although does not mean I’m some expert. Addiction is caused by psychological conditioning and sometimes genetics. An example of psychological conditioning is ringing a bell when feeding a dog at the same time. If the bell was rung without being fed, the dog would pay not much attention. However if that bell is rung enough times while food is presented to, he’s getting something he wants. The sound of a bell will be ingrained in his mind that he’s getting something he needs or wants. See where I’m going with this?

 

Those vulnerable to HARMFUL addiction usually have a traumatic event during childhood or a chemical imbalance. Sometimes its low self esteem or a combination. A submissive who feels they are too shy to meet men or have faced much rejection find themselves paying other guys for attention. Sometimes from an unfulfilling marriage that makes them feel they aren’t good enough. It can be hustlers, boys on cam sites, or cash doms doesn’t matter. Feeling emotions of a void can lead to the attention to wanting male contact, even if it costs them money. It can be in person from an app like grindr/tinder or online like masters here on the site.

 

A person who is NATURALLY submissive because of life experiences will find the joy in sending cash while being rewarded with warmth, attention, and rush powerful to those with weak minds. Those who are easily influenced or have mental scars began to equate that being used and manipulated just seems natural as its what they are used to. Sometimes a sub can feel a sense of guilt for something  they’ve done and feel disgusted with themselves. These subs can go into gambling or… into the scene of losing your cash to guys for attention. These subs feel as if they deserve to be taken advantage of, truly feel like losers, and hate themselves. So being abused while being sexually stimulated begins to wove into one.

 

When masters tell a sub what he has been told its entire life, it becomes pleasurable. Sometimes resassurement (without separating fantasy from reality) can be what makes an addiction worse. Take anorexia which is a mental disorder. Karen Carpenter (famous singer) was the first famous case to die of the disease. With many anorexics, never tell them they look good. Hearing that they look beautiful (when they need to eat) is a RUSH as it makes them feel warm and encouraged to feel that rush again. (When a master says YOU’VE BEEN RINSED FAGGOT! It makes you feel complete and whole and makes you just do it again.) Karen would hear it over and over, to where it drove her to lose until she died of a heart attack at age 32.

 

Many financial subs tell themselves this is a fun guilty pleasure. In the beginning it starts with cam shows.. sometimes buying things…. and the cash drains are minimal. As they dive deeper into the scene things they hear about such as team viewer become an exciting idea. In the beginning many say, “Ok THAT i will NEVER do” only to find themselves doing it anyway. Like a heroin user who swears they will never shoot up but still do anyway. Eventually after being psychologically conditioned, SOME financial subs will find it difficult to cum if they aren’t getting cash fucked. This is where the addiction becomes dangerous and unhealthy.

 

Do you find yourself crying or feeling like you are in a state of panic after being cash fucked? Do the negative feelings overpower the rush of submission? You have a problem my friend, and you need to realize its not the scene thats harming you, its yourself. Its like walking into a bar. The majority can drink responsibly… but there are always those alcoholics that can’t control themselves. The bar isn’t dangerous unless its harming the drinker because of his addiction. If being dead broke turns you on (such as extreme measures like bankruptcy) and you still have means of surviving, be safe and have fun. BDSM is about letting go, taking over, and having a fun experience even if you feel “pain.” If you feel you CAN take control again, learn to try and set limits, or avoid triggers in your home or things around you. Take a break from the scene and practice. Avoid hearing or seeing anything that reminds you of being cash fucked recklessly. Tell yourself you are a good person. Look in the mirror and say you love yourself. If this doesn't help, go to a sex addictions annoymous meeting. Ive sent a few slaves there, and financial domination is a COMMON topic talked about in SA. You're not alone! If you can't do that, then you're asking for a life of unpleasurable pain. If you can learn to do soul searching and enjoy other sexual fetishes or appetites, try again and remember the self training youve done to help yourself. In subspace you are a fucking idiot, pathetic, and a worthless moron. And thats how it should be.

 

A cash slave who has a set tax on a due date, has their finances controlled, or just likes getting drained via different methods, can still enjoy this aspect of BDSM and live a healthy life to where shame and regret happen less often. Slaves who are extreme that have NO control over their money can STILL live this life and be happy without negative consequences. THAT requires a master with compassion that isn’t all about greed. That however is very risky and should be done with someone you’ve trusted for a long time. I will with another blog at some point in avoiding putting yourself in situations such as being betrayed by your master.

 

I will also at some point write about safety tips for subs.

 

I hope this has inspired some of you or has given you food for thought.

 

Check out my blog on trust, communication and limits.

https://dominants.co/blog/763/preventing-crawl-back-cycles-trust-and-respecting-limits/

 

Remembering that slaves are human too

https://dominants.co/blog/773/remembering-that-slaves-are-human-too/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Post in: Domination
subboy17
Thank you for this post. It hits home. This is the cycle I’ve been stuck in for so long and it’s made me lose everything. I appreciate that you show there is still hope.
KrisHawk
I knew it would hit for some..... glad it made sense :-)
markus52
one of the best texts i have read about this theme. thank you very much.
KrisHawk
If you find this helpful read my blog on "Subs are human too" The reason im writing about these things is because nobody wants to talk about it....
subboy17
Please keep these going. It means a lot to know I’m not alone. Would be nice to connect with the subs you mention in the post that went to SAA.
KrisHawk
Contact me on skype
wannabenutted
Great food for thought Sir
KrisHawk
This blog is probably the one I’m proud of most now.
mindtrappedfag
Needing a Dom who understand this way how my mind is working
KrisHawk
Try and use common judgement. Don’t serve someone right away after meeting them. Ones who want cash right away BEWARE. Notice how they hold conversations. Ask them random minimal questions and ask again later in the future to test their integrity.
obeyingu
Really a nice blog and helpful analysis. Thank you.
KrisHawk
writing something similar to help slaves play safe so they don’t feel regret after. BDSM should NEVER result in regret.
mindtrappedfag
Think any fag should be proud to serve you,while being protected by you at the same time.